The Beginning

I always remember being fat. Always. Though I don't really remember getting picked on at school for it. If they did, it was behind my back when I wasn't looking. I remember not really having friends though.

The kids that did make fun of me were people in my class at church. I remember them drawing on the board stick pictures of themselves and a fat, round person for me. I would go home crying every Sunday to my mom.

I never really got invited anywhere. Later in school, I would start to act out in classes that I knew I could get away with it in. If people weren't going to like the shy, quiet, fat Kimberly, maybe they would like the goofy, funny Kimberly. It's not that I would really act out - just say random things and try to make jokes about things. Though it never really worked either.

I remember going to BYU-Idaho for the first time. I was terrified to meet my roommates (all 5 of them) because of the way I looked. I was scared it would be like Primary (the class for ages 3-11 at church) all over again. Not that they would draw on the board, but that they would make fun and not like me. When I walked in with my brother (Court) who was helping me move in I saw two roommates sitting on the couch watching tv and they were both absolutely skinny - chilling in their pj pants and tank tops. I remember being absolutely jealous.

I didn't want my brother to leave. I wanted him to stay. I remember crying with nerves when he left. He stayed for quite a while though. Help me get set up, took me to the store (I was totally car-less all three semesters at school -- as in no car of my own), etc.

It turned out to be totally different. I became friends with 4 of the 5 girls. They made me feel welcome and like I was part of the "family". They always tried including me in whatever they did (except the 1000s of dates they were always going on haha - they couldn't bring their roommate along on those!).

I lost a little bit of weight maybe 10 lbs being at school and remember coming home the skinniest I had ever been or ever remembered. It wasn't much but it was like 190 or something like that.

Then I met a boy and married him and had two kids --

I recently did blood work for just routine stuff after I had Riglee. My bad cholesterol number was a bit high at like 113 and my A1C test for diabetes was 5.6%. The doctor told me that I needed to diet (a 1200 to 1400 calorie diet even) and exercise.

Luckily, I was able to tell him I had started as soon as he released me (after a c-section, you can't do anything for 6 weeks...I mean anything!). Yesterday, I joined a gym and went and worked out for about 40 minutes. I am feeling it now - I'm not really looking forward to paying for a gym membership, but my health is totally worth it.

I'm tired of being the big, fat sister. I want to get down to a healthy weight. My ultimate goal is to get down to 150 lbs. I have a long way to go, but I am hoping to do it.

I am watching what I eat - kind of going back on the low carb diets I was on when I was pregnant and I am trying not to eat after 7 or 8 (depending on how soon I get dinner ready etc).

I plan on making this my weight loss journal - posting how I'm feeling, what I've eaten, how much I've lost, etc.

So let the Excursion begin...